Ur-ine Trouble for making Dropped Calls!

(this is not my phone... it is a dramatization of the story that is yet to come)

Yesterday, Caiden and I spent the whole day shopping in Albuquerque. We were getting ready to leave town so I decided that Caiden needed to go potty before the long ride home.

I took him into the public bathroom that was busy with people.

Caiden went pee-pee but the automatic toilet didn't flush. I figured I would just use the toilet too. (To much info, but it is imperative for the story.)

So not realizing my cell phone was in my back pocket, I hear a plooop as my pants are coming down.... I look behind me and there is my cell phone sitting in the toilet. NOW THE STUPID TOILET DECIDES TO FLUSH??? I reached in a grabbed it out just before it went all the way down... AAAGGHH.

Of course I am freaking out and people are laughing because I am freaking out! I was not swearing. I was not angry. I was freaking out because of the fact that I had just stuck my hands in pee and whatever other millions of strangers germs lurk in public toilets!

If you know me, I can't stand to have my hands dirty... So I was not coping well!!!

Just then the phone started to ring. It sounded horrible like, well, it had just been dropped in a toilet... Kind of like a speaker that was blown out in a stereo. Really muffled and crackly sounding.

I tried to answer it, but I couldn't hear a thing. Now I had pee on my hands and my ear....So what did I do??? I blew in the speaker.... Now I had pee on my hands, ear and face!!!! I tried to call Scott back but the #4 and #8 no longer worked. I pushed speed dial instead and he answered, but he just kept saying, "HUH? HUH? I can't hear you." I was saying to him, "HUH? WHAT? I can't hear you, I just dropped my phone in the toilet!!!" I hung up the stupid phone and started drying it under the high power hand dryer.

The phone starts going crazy.... *84*84*84*84*84 over and over again... Then it starts trying to send TEXT messages and the phones MP3 player starts up too (Plus I hated the song. BRITNEY SPEARS', 'OOPS I DID IT AGAIN!' ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!) The calendar function comes up and is saying- "No scheduled events for today!" (YEAH, LIKE I PLANNED ON DROPPING MY PHONE IN THE TOILET!!!)

I washed my hands and grabbed a few paper towels. Then with possessed phone in hand, I headed out to my car. I grabbed the bottle of hand sanitizer and used it like LOTION!!!

Hands, ear, neck and lips!!! EWWWW, that tasted worse than PEE Water!

Remember the paper towels? They came in handy. I used the paper towels and hand sanitizer and started cleaning my phone off... all the while it seemed to be laughing at me! It was now vibrating and beeping!

Hours later......I removed the battery, disinfected everything the best I could, opened up all the ports on the phone. After all that, I MADE it take a TIME OUT!

I reprogrammed the 'hot keys' and what do you know??? It is working perfectly again!!! It isn't foggy on the screen, the scroll wheel scrolls and the numbers are all functioning. The speaker even sounds good too!

So that is the whole story.... It gives new meaning to having Crappy Cell Service.